Contempt, Infidelity, and Healing By Your Therapist in Sugar Land, TX
The love of your life cheated on you. However it happened, it has left you hurt... You feel alone, you're anxious all the time, and you are angry. You played by the rules. You lived the “I only have eyes for you until death do us part”. You never thought that the person you knew would do this to you. You thought they were a good person to their core. Now, that respect is gone. In fact, it has shifted to a deep disrespect for your partner. Maybe you tried to hide it, but now it is coming out and damaging the reconciliation process or the co-parenting process. The sarcastic comments spill from your mouth, biting and cutting through anything your partner does or says. Any minor ounce of noble act they attempt to do is met with mockery because you know who they really are. You cannot help but point out how they disappoint you as you say, “You have always disappointed me regarding ______, you have never been good about ____”. This is not the person you want to be. You can see how people react to your comments, mockery, and sarcasm about your partner, and you are starting to realize you are not proud of the person you are becoming. I know that these behaviors come from a place of deep hurt, betrayal trauma (aka infidelity trauma). I know that you have developed these responses because your "survival system" (fight-or-flight) is activated because of the deep hurt and betrayal you experienced after they cheated. Infidelity trauma is real, and it hurts. I know you want to find yourself again, to be a stronger person and proud of who you are, but you are not sure what to do. I can help. I help people every day recover from infidelity trauma, and I can help you.
Our first meeting is simple. It is a get-to-know-you where I hear about your life, who you have been through the years, what you have been through, and where you want to go. After the initial appointment, we begin working on establishing a self-care routine that helps you invite calm back into your body. We work to rebuild trust in yourself and the other people in your life. So that the trauma from your infidelity betrayal does not seep in and slowly suffocate your other relationships. I'll teach you to use a "gentle startup" by expressing needs using "I" statements, focusing on feelings, and being positive. We will work to rebuild your trust so that you can be in the best position to build a culture of appreciation and respect in the future if you are working to reconcile or coparent. I want you to feel confident in yourself, so that when the time comes, you can have conversations with your partner, even when the topics are difficult, and feel you can communicate effectively for yourself in a constructive and productive manner. I want you to be able to feel like you can leave this toxic place you are in. With my help, you will be able to confidently advocate for your needs and desires in a healthy way. I provide education about how to replace negative communication patterns so that you can have productive, healthy conflict resolution in the future.
The infidelity, trauma, and hurt should not have to be something you carry with you forever. We can utilize EMDR therapy to help you process the trauma and feel at peace, closing that chapter in your life. DBT therapy helps you tolerate those hard conversations so that you can co-parent or work on reconciliation. CBT helps you in recognizing your rumination and negative thought patterns so you can “rewire your anxious brain” and free yourself from being the negative Nancy. Please do not wait another day. Contact Alyssia today, your therapist in Sugar Land, Texas, for help recovering from your infidelity trauma. Do not let contempt drive you a day longer.
