Healing After Betrayal: Understanding and Recovering from Infidelity Trauma by Your Therapist in Sugar Land
What counts as infidelity trauma?
Something has happened in your relationship, and it has shaken you. Your appetite has changed, your sleep is completely out of whack, your body is pulsing with anxiety, you keep playing out the same moment over and over again in your mind, and it is torture. You have not spoken about it with friends and family because you cannot make sense of what you just discovered, or maybe you have, and you have been made to feel that what you are feeling is wrong, that you are overreacting, and that the problem is with you and it has left you wondering, am I crazy, am I the one who is in the wrong for thinking that this is wrong?
Infidelity trauma is when there has been a betrayal of trust. It can be physical through a partner’s physical affair, it can be an emotional affair, or a moment of discovery of something that you thought was off limits in your relationship, such as pornography. Infidelity is when there has been a boundary rule that has been broken in the relationship. This often involved the other partner being deceptive and breaking the promise that you guys had made to be exclusive to one another.
What is happening to me?
After an affair has been discovered, we often begin to feel symptoms closely related to PTSD. We picture our significant other with the other person over and over, even if we have not directly seen it, as if it were a flashback. You get flashbacks of the moment you discovered the infidelity. You feel constant anxiety, you no longer trust other people, and you often experience a feeling of a lost sense of safety. Without a plan to recover from infidelity, you can experience a long-lasting erosion of your self-esteem.
What does recovery from infidelity trauma look like?
Infidelity trauma is complex. It is not something that will be fixed in 10 sessions. It takes time and commitment. The symptoms you experience and are treating are similar to those of PTSD from infidelity. You begin by processing your grief. You process the anger, the hurt, and the feelings of betrayal. As a therapist, I sit with you and hold your heart with you as we pick up the pieces piece by piece. During this process, we work on grounding techniques, practice self-care, and establish a framework for a lifestyle that works for you as you navigate this difficult time. As you can feel, this has changed your life, and things may be different for a while. We are working to establish a way of life that is supportive of you and your needs and nourishes you as you work to sort through the hurt, anger, overwhelm, anxiety, and sadness this has caused.
From there, we begin rebuilding your trust in yourself. We work on healing the wounds that can come from negative beliefs born out of an affair, it was my fault, there is something wrong with me, I am ugly, I deserve this, I am permanently ruined. For this, I like to use EMDR to help you process those negative beliefs and regain confidence in yourself as you reflect on what you are going through.
As you work through the stages of recovery from infidelity trauma, as your therapist in Sugar Land, TX, at Southern Pine Counseling, I teach you how to set boundaries and how to understand what your emotions are telling you, and help you regain confidence in yourself. We work together to listen to your heart and create a plan for your life that aligns with your values and what you want as you move forward from this moment. I want you to remember that the further you get into your infidelity recovery, the more your pain begins to fade. Recovery from infidelity trauma is not linear; it is a winding path, but for those who truly want to heal, there is hope, and you can overcome the hurt you are feeling. Please do not suffer through this trauma alone. Contact me today so that you can begin to recover from the infidelity in your life. I am here to help, and I want to help you recover, thrive, and feel at peace again.
